Since I consider this a site about my ‘musings from a convert’ I suppose it is appropriate to tell my story of conversion.  I’ve told this a few times now in various Wards and to friends, and I’m sure each time I embellish a little more – I’ll try to keep it real here :-).  Conversion experiences can be deeply personal ones and affect people differently.  I hope not to offend anyone in the process of telling my story.

I attended college at Northern Arizona University in Flagstaff, Arizona.  About my sophomore year I found out my parents were splitting after 25 years of marriage.  By this time my sister (whom also went to NAU) had graduated college and moved on with her life.  The news of this impending divorce struck me hard.  Real hard.  The details are scandalous which made it even worse.  Let’s just say it wasn’t a split of the “we’re just not getting along anymore” type.  It struck me to the core enough that I still don’t think I’ve fully recovered a definition of family…but that’s for another post I guess.

During the next few years I struggled trying to rectify this and became close with a bunch of people, namely my fraternity brothers (I’m a Delta Chi in case you were wondering).  I was glad to have a close family of ‘brothers’ that I could escape reality with.  And being around sorority girls didn’t hurt either.  During this time I became involved in educational leadership quite a bit.  I went to a lot of leadership conferences across the country.  One was a Sigma Phi Epsilon conference.  At the time, their motto was “Balanced Man” (it is now a little more politically correct with ‘Balanced Leaders’).  The Balanced Man was a philosophy of living a balanced life in the categories of emotional, physical and spiritual well being.  I was at this conference and attended a session about the Balanced Man philosophy.  It was presented by a Zig Ziglar graduate so you know it was good.  He talked about these areas of your life and why they are such key pillars for a foundation of well being.  At this time I was weight-lifting at least 4 days a week and rode my bike everywhere (a stark contrast to 60lbs later today).  Emotionally I was in a high.  I was dating someone great, had great friends and was pretty much on my own living what I felt was a responsible life.  I was happy.  Spiritually…hmmm, not so much.  It wasn’t that this ever bothered me before, it just wasn’t in my life anymore – in any form.  Spirituality in this philosophy wasn’t just about religion, but to me it was – and made me reflect on my life at that point in this category.

I was raised Catholic (my father is Lutheran, but now practices under the ‘I believe there is a God, I just don’t think I need to be a part of organized religion to believe that’ church.  At this point I was working for a great guy, Frank Shushok, who was a devout Baptist.  I told him about my reflections and he invited me to talk about it more with him.  He invited me to his church as well, which I attended.  I also went back to my Catholic roots and attended church.  Nothing I found felt right…at all.  I can say that with all sincerity.

As it was I was living in my fraternity house (we were the only ones with a physical off-campus house, so you could imagine the lifestyle :-)).  I was surrounded by great guys, but all a bunch of pranksters.  Unknown to me the girl I was dating at the time was LDS.  I didn’t really know what LDS was to be honest.  I grew up in an area that, upon reflection, probably wasn’t a high LDS population.  There were no seminaries near my schools and I didn’t recall any friends (granted I was – and maybe still am – a dork in high school) really mentioning anything.  So my prankster fraternity brothers decided that it would be funny to call the missionaries for me.  I didn’t know this was happening of course, nor did they know I had been seeking some spirituality.  I get a call that went something like this:

Caller: Hi, Tim?  This is Elder <whomever> from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  We received your inquiry about a Book of Mormon.
Me: huh?
Caller: Didn’t you call a number on the television?
Me: (chuckling) No, but what can I do for you?
Caller: Well, we’d like to talk with you about our Church if you are available?

long pause

Me: You know what, sure.
Caller: Great, when can we come over?
Me: Um, probably not a good idea to come here.  Where can I meet you?

And you know how it goes.  I began meeting the missionaries at the Institute in Flagstaff.  It was an interesting experience.  I did feel welcome.  I also sensed the newness of the Elders at that time but I listened with real intent.  Things started to feel right (and some a little odd).  I remember attending my Business Law class one day (I graduated with a criminal justice degree and now I’m a software developer, go figure) when my instructor, Tom Palmer, approached me in the hallway.  So how are those missionary discussions going? Fine, I replied with a freaked out look.  He just walked away with a smile.  Turns out he was the Stake President.  Nice.  Total sidenote: but best professor I had…ever.  The same experience happened with the father of the girl I was dating.  Turns out, he was a Bishop.  What is going on?! I was thinking to myself.  I had lunch with Bishop Mayes one day and he asked me how things were going and was curious why I wasn’t telling his daughter that I was taking the discussions (and I wasn’t telling anyone at all).  I told him this was a very personal process for me and I couldn’t have it clouded with external influences – any decision had to be my own, completely.

Well after the course of 6 months or so I took all the discussions and was baptized in November 1995.  It was a beautiful day and process of which I’ll share at some point here as well…maybe the next post.  I was surrounded by great people who helped me learn and discern for myself what the right decision was.  From President Palmer, Bishop Norman Mayes and Bishop Dennis Kelley were all great men that have inspired my spirituality to-date.

So there you have it.  Fraternity prank gone bad (for them) is my ultimate conversion story.  And no, my current wife is not the girl I was dating.  As you could imagine it was a tough road to explain to family and friends my decision.  Actually it was only tough for them to accept it (and some still haven’t).  Everyone becomes an expert on theology when you decide to make a decision for your life.

So that’s my story…hmm, now on to the balanced man physical part again – maybe I should go back to that conference.