I have to be honest, I don’t like being called “Brother Heuer.”  Why?  Because that’s not who I am as an identity.  I’m Tim.  (For the record I don’t like being called Mr. Heuer either.)  I know that generations grew up differently and have a whole ‘respect your elders’ mantra to them, but it just seems as a society we’ve progressed beyond that.  People call my children by their first name, so why shouldn’t my children call them by their first name?

Anyhow, on to the brother/sister thing.  I know other religions practice this similarly as well.  As LDS members I see this practice mostly under the roof of a Church building.  Rarely do I see members of the Elder’s Quorums waiting at the bus stop referring to each other as Brother Smith.  So why do we feel so compelled to do so?  It is an odd thing for me and maybe it is because I haven’t grown up with it.  We do have friends that insist on our children calling them Sister so-and-so and despite our wishes for their kids to call us by our names, they will not allow them to do that.  I have to respect their parental authority however perverse (kidding, of course) it is. 

I’ll say it again: I am Tim.  There is no “Brother” on my birth certificate.  Others may say it is out of respect for the position you hold.  If that is the case, why don’t the Elders Quorum members call each other Elder instead of brother in the hallways?  Good morning Elder Heuer.  But that would confuse us with the missionaries I guess.  I do, however, break my own rule with regard to Bishops and Stake Presidents.  Why?  Great question, I guess it is an elevated title for me – probably the same reason I wouldn’t walk into the White House and say “Hey George, how’s it hanging?”  But outside of Church, I call them by their names.  Is there some doctrinal guidance I’m missing here?  Because I just think it is cultural and maybe that’s why I’m so hung up on it.

The other thing that I find odd and still haven’t gotten used to is the use of the full name.  I can’t tell you the last time somebody called me Timothy.  Again, I don’t identify with that name.  I’m sure this is a practice rooted in the family ancestry ties and beliefs of the Church and for official records, blessings, etc. I’ve got no problem with that.  But should I ever be called to speak at Conference, I’m going to fight for the overlay on the television to be “Tim Heuer” and not “Timothy K. Heuer” – heck there have been times I’ve forgotten my middle name because it is never uttered.  I suppose one could argue that such talks are “official” and any business of the Church is official and thus documented for our posterity…which that might fly with me.

I’m just saying, if you see me in Church…I’m Tim, feel free to call me that and skip the Brother :-).